Drunk college kids often find it amusing to drink with homeless people. More at 10.


Sorry for the delay -- things have been crazy around here. But not really that crazy, I've just been too busy having a good time outside of the internet. Go figure.

But, I'm sure that's all going to end pretty soon -- my classes are going to be freaking crazy this term. I'm taking five heady Computer Science classes and I can tell that my free-time quotent is going to severely drop. suck. I'm taking: Intro to Computational Theory, Finite Automata, Artifical Intelligence, Programming Language Fundamentals, Graphics and my Senior Capstone. Holy shit.

But yeah, the first week back in classes was great. At the end of Summer, I was *so* very ready for classes to start. I had about two weeks of idle time that almost killed me. I don't do well being idle. I kept myself busy, but on the whole, I'd much rather have 5,000 things to stress about than have no stress at all. Fuck my work ethic.

The weekends have been spent in a drunken stupor. I'm really trying to relish every moment of my last year in Corvallis.

On Saturday (gameday here at OSU), I was disturbed at 3:30am by my friend Cam, who was soaking wet, drunk and knocking on my door. He asked if he could come in. I obliged. He told me that he had just experienced the most fucked up thing. I asked what it was, but he was hesitant to tell me. Finally, I got it out of him:

So he was at a Frat party, drunk as a skunk, when someone accidentally pulled the fire alarm. The fire dept. and the cops showed up, determined that there was no fire and the fire dept. dipped out, but the cops, they stuck around to ask some questions. My friend cam, who is a minor, decided to be clever. He went to his friend's room, where a bunch of people were watching "The Italian Job" on a projector. They were laying low, so that if the cops came, they could say "sorry officer, we were just watching this [crappy] movie."

Anyway, Cam pulls up a seat on a couch this dark room. After a few minutes, the girl next to him asks if he could sit on his lap. Being drunk and horny, he obliged. A few minutes go by and this girl, she starts getting all up on him. Rubbing his leg and his junk, she starts sucking on his earlobe. He's stoked at this point, it's late and he had already given up his nightly search for some tail.

The cops open the door and turn on the lights. Then, it happens. Cam realizes that the girl, who is still sucking on his ear, is a freaking midget. Cam, not being the "suave, polite" type, flips shit and stands up, nearly throwing this girl to the floor. The cops standing there, a midget lying on the floor, Cam yells "W h a t t h e f u c k" and tries to quickly exit the room. The cops stop his flight, determine that he is drunk and promptly issue him a MIP.

Fucking amazing.

If you know who DJ Shadow is, this is fucking amazing as well. Makes me feel old though.

Forgive me, please.

eric

Monday 03 October 2005 at 3:18 pm

Six comments

If I was at some stupid recital and they started playing that I would most certainly go shite in me panth.
sledg
Monday 03 October 2005 at 3:18 pm
I want them to try assembling a composition of "Welcome to the Jungle, Baby!" by Hella - then I would be impressed.
Jeryl
Monday 03 October 2005 at 3:18 pm
It's ON: Finite Automata is my next cat's name.
Also, Feigs, midget is not the preferred nomenclature. Little people, please.
Sarah C.
Monday 03 October 2005 at 3:18 pm
you want a cat? my cat had kitties and there is one left... she would make a fine finite automata...
sarah
Monday 03 October 2005 at 3:18 pm
yea thoes guys were pretty good.
jon r
Monday 03 October 2005 at 3:18 pm
I would like a cat. Especially from another Sarah. Unfortunately, I'm kind of a hobo right now and I don't feel yet too right about promoting my non-lifestyle through an awesome cat.
Sarah C.
Monday 03 October 2005 at 3:18 pm

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