i picked up my stylus today, and this fell out! neat.

i was in the laundryroom, washing my clothes, doing some homework (already, i know) and i just couldn't shake these memories of her. they were silly little memories, phone calls from years ago, before all of this strife, postcards from florida with sketches of seashell bongs on the back, the endless supply of pink and purple gel pens that she had.

weird.

it's like hitting a brick wall. things go so fast and then... nothing. we'll see how this pans out.

today was uneventful. i went to class, i came here, i washed my clothes, i watched some futurama, i ate, i drew.

it's weird, i always come to a point when i'm drawing where i'm faced with the decision to continue working or to give up. i usually give up. it's not that i'm lazy, but i get to a point where i just don't care anymore. i get to a point where the inspiration is gone and i'm left with trying to make it look good. i don't operate like that. call it a lack of dedication, but i say you can't get blood from a stone.

what the fuck am i talking about?

it's 2am. i'm going to watch futurama until i pass out.

bye!

firedoor.

eric

Friday 09 January 2004 at 01:56 am

Three comments

You may never see this. you know exactly what you're talking about. the mind is most clear at 2 am. Hope to talk to you more in depth some day.
girl
Friday 09 January 2004 at 01:56 am
you may never read this. you know exactly what you're talking about. the mind is most clear at 2 am. i've found that we should commit ourselves to somehitng for as long as we're passionate about it. this applies to art, as it applies to love, and career, and all things. someday we'll talk more in depth.
girl
Friday 09 January 2004 at 01:56 am
Those feelings of walking around numb to the world with a hole in you, when little memories of things you thought you would forget sneak up on you at the most random times it always makes you feel like someone is tearing out your heart. Even if you know that things were never meant to be and that they will never again be, it stil hurts to remember, especially the happy memories. Things that you want out of your head so that you can move on are the memories that you can never shed. Even if you are the happiest you have ever been and have moved on some things just always will be with you, unfortunatley through past regrets I know these feelings well. But I wouldn't change anything now, even if I could.
sarah
Friday 09 January 2004 at 01:56 am

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