sometimes i feel like the world is moving all around me, but i am staying in one place; like my back is to the wind and i can see leaves and garbage bins rolling around, but i remain standing.  it would be so easy for me to move with the impending storm.  i want to so badly.  instead, i do my own thing.  i drink my green tea, shower, commute, work, go to school, go home, go to sleep. it's a pattern of which i am tiring.

however, i made some calls to some apartments today.  hopefully i'll get out of the house that is constantly a party for drunken, horny 15-17 year olds that wrestle and squeal and smoke lots of pot.  it may be fun in a time in place, but not in the time and place right now.  i miss being able to fully call a residence mine.  i feel transitional living with my dad and brother, and i think i'm done with it.  i want to be able to listen to jeff buckley without the kiddies turning up nelly or jay-z or eminem.  i want to be able to depend on cheez-its being in the cupboard instead of disappearing due to some overwhelming munchy fiasco. 

basically, i want some change in my life.  i'm sick of the way things are, and i know they can be much better.  here's to the future.