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I like buffalo burgers

I feel that I'm off to a pretty good start to summer. Granted, it's almost July, so we're almost a month in, but since the craptastic weather up here hasn't been cooperating, it hasn't really truly felt like summer to me.


I've been making trips here and there quite steadily since May. End of April I went down to LA to visit my sister and her husband. Good times were had. It was mostly a lot of Disneyland and a lot of good food, both things that I really enjoy. Also, spending time with my sister and Steve is never bad. We did two days in Disneyland, which made me happy, even though I got sunburned on the second day. My sister couldn't figure out why, as she distinctly remembered seeing me pull out the tube of sunscreen, but then I had to explain that I only bothered to apply that to my tattoos, and forgot about the rest. Woops. My bad.

As soon as I got back from LA, I had about a two day break to unpack, do laundry, and then repack to leave to go to a logistics conference in Keystone, CO. Boring boring boring, lots of blah blah blah, I was not too thrilled about going. Except that this year my supervisor and her husband went. We got condos slightly removed from where the conference center was, complete with kitchens and cable. Let's just say that while I thought I would be suffering through long sessions all day, we ended up getting a lot of use out of temporary homes by stocking the fridge and watching trashy tv. Hey, if it's my boss suggesting we blow off classes to fuck off, I'm alright with that.
For one of our FO days we decided to drive about an hour out of Keystone and go gambling. My boss is a seasoned gambler, but I had never been. I allotted myself a certain amount of money before going in, and did not let myself spend more than that. To sum up my experience: gambling is dumb. I lost my money, won it back, then lost it again. The ONLY perk was the free drinks, but seriously, it wasn't even worth that. I can think of way better things to spend my money on. I don't feel the need to ever gamble again.

Then June rolled around.... My boy's band had a couple shows on the road, one in Moscow, ID, the other at a festival at Lolo Hot Spring, MT. We decided since they were already going to be all the way over there, I should just come along for the shows, and when they were done we would roll down to Yellowstone for five days of camping. I was totally down.
First stop was Moscow at a bar called John's Alley, which I have heard many a tale of, but never experienced myself. A pretty sweet little spot, one of only two venues in the town that do live music. Shuffle board, ping pong, and--wait for it--you can still smoke in the bars in Idaho!!! Sweet Jesus, I have never been so excited about having a cigarette. I have mostly cut back to only smoking when I drink, but man it's a pain in the ass to have to get up and go outside to smoke. So, in spite of the fact that it was actually quite warm in the bar, and I would have probably enjoyed walking outside for some fresh air, I chose to stay inside and smoke because I can.
Second stop was the Love Your Mother Earth Festival in Montana. It was an awesome spot, but it was cold as balls, and I spent the two days there so bundled up I almost felt like it was January all over again. Lots of campfire smoke, lots of booze, lots of other illicit drugs, and a good time all around.

The impending doom


It was kind of doom and gloom on the way to Yellowstone. The forecast did not look promising, but we said fuck it, we were going to have fun anyway. We did get rained on every night we were there, but luckily we both got really effing good at setting up camp with tarps and trenches so as to keep our tent and ourselves completely dry. Heck yes for having camping skills.
I'd never been to Yellowstone, and he had only been once as a kid, so we were pretty stoked on getting to do this. Our goals for the week: see a bear, see a moose, see a buffalo.

They do what the fuck they want


Five minutes into the gates we saw a buffalo. I was stoked. And then we saw more. And more. And dammit, more buffalo. Turns out those fuckers are everywhere, and the novelty really wears off when every time you drive around a corner there are nine cars stopped in the road, everyone taking pictures out their windows of the herd eating/shitting in the field. I wanted to tell them to just keep driving, because they'd see another heard in about a mile and a half. By the time we left Yellowstone, I decided that the next buffalo I saw better be served well done on a plate in either steak or burger form. Buffalo are boring.
But we did see our moose and our bear, which was awesome.

This almost doesn't look real to me


After a few nights in Yellowstone we went south to spend a night in the Tetons. That was amazing. Of course I suck and have no pictures of it, but let me just say that if you have to choose one or the other, bypass Yellowstone and head straight to Grand Tetons. Yellowstone, while there is some cool stuff to see, is essentially Nature's Amusement Park. Everything is drivable, walkable, super easily accessible, which means large groups of tourists everywhere. By the time we left, Chris pretty much summed it up by saying "I"m so sick of fat groups of fat people...." Oh, and Old Faithful? Not that awesome. We were more excited about the coffee we were about to go buy than standing and watching the geyser. Sorry if I just crushed anyone's dreams....

Then this weekend I went home to the Valley for my friend Sarah's graduation party. There is something so calming and comforting for me about going home to sit by the pool and watch the sunset with my three girls. Chris had a show in Ashland on Thursday then headed down to McKinnleyville on Friday, so on their way back Saturday the band dropped him in Grants Pass and I snagged him and subjected him to the craziness of Sarah's friends, family, friends' families, and all the fun times that come along. He held his own, and even enjoyed himself. I think he gets what it is about going home that I love so much now....

Next up: I'm heading down to Arkansas the second week of July (I think) to help my friend and former co-worker move back to Oregon. She moved down there for a job a boy, neither of which was worth it, so she's heading back up here for a better job in a better state. We're going to drive across the south, then north through California, mostly because from LA on up we have people to stay with and it'll cut down on hotel costs. I'm not super jazzed about that many days of driving, but she's a fun girl and I have a feeling we're going to make this a fun trip.

So there you have it. My very long-winded update for my not-so-exciting life. But just in case anyone was wondering what the hell I've been up to, there you have it.
Maybe I'll try to find interesting pictures along the way from Arkansas to Oregon and post tidbits along the way.
Love you all.


always.....

How I want to Die

I want to die underneath a weeping willow tree, but on my bed. The current bed I have would be perfect as its print is an outer space one with space ships and robots. I hope that because this is what I die on, that my afterlife will be like whats depicted on the print. So no sheets on the bed. Weeping willows calm me down and i think would make for a really serene death. I want this weeping willow to be located in the middle of a stranger's giant meadow. I want to die alone. I'm afraid of dying alone but in this particular daydream, I would be alone. Maybe some grazing sheep in the meadow would be fine.

There would be speakers hidden around me, and the sounds coming out of them would be those of Popol Vuh's soundtrack to Aguirre: The Wrath of God. There would be a very comfortable breeze, and it would be a beautiful day. I would wear my "Retired and Loving It" shirt and maybe some boxer briefs.

I know that in this scenario, I would want to bleed out. I am not sure, however, how I would want to accomplish that. A method that seems satisfying at the moment seems to be the one of shooting myself in the chest, but it might be too painful. I could slit my wrists but then I wouldnt be able to hate emo kids anymore. But maybe thats the best way to go...

I wonder who would find my body. I also miss my cat.

PDX 2.0, Lazerbeamz 2.0, Life 2.0



This was written a few months ago and i forgot to post it:

Im moving into whats looking to be Lazerbeams part 2 with Wispy, my bud Garett, and a fourth roommate to be announced at a future time. Its a giant 3+ bedroom house off Hawthorne on 52nd st. Score to the max. Only 1400/month. This house could be Lazerbeam's older brother. It was built in 1903 and has all sorts of funky things going on with it along with a big basement which is apparently the norm here in Port-town. The "Fourth Bedroom" is this tiny little room with bunk beds built into the wall along with a desk and shelving also part of the room. So rad. We are gonna have to buy like 6 couches just to fill the living room. Im so stoked. We sign the papers on Wednesday. I havent had an actual home since November 20th. So its going to be nice to not be living out of my dufflebag any longer.

In lady news, she got approved for her US work Visa and she flies over on March 29th. There is not enough sex that can be accomplished in the next year that can make up for how much sweet lovin' we owe each other. I honestly can not wait to touch her butt. And kiss those beautiful lips. We have a lot of movies to catch up on as well.

I went to an Oscar party at Lord Bearded's cousin Veronica's house with my good pal Blonde Katie. I hate the oscars but its just nice to be able to be social again. Anyway, as expected, the oscars were very predictable and as usual they handed the statues to the most mediocre option almost every single time. Im sorry, cuz it seems like Im the only one that thinks this, but FUCK Slumdog Millionaire. That movie is a made for TV level story with better Cinematography and a foreign setting. Thats it. I tend to like Danny Boyle but c'mon man. Everyone needs to pull their fucking head out of their ass. Also, the way they presented the two screenplay categories was unbearably bad. All it did was show how easy it actually is to write a screenplay. Also the way they had previous acting winners address the current nominees was awkward and overlong for the most part. Also, Sean Penn over Mickey Rourke? Im assuming this is simply because more people saw Milk than who saw The Wrestler. I liked Milk quite a bit but Mickey Rourke's performance in The Wrestler Iwould put on par with Daniel Day-Lewis in There Will Be Blood. Meaning it will live on as classic for longer than Penn's performance, which was good. With all that said, there were some pleasant surprises. Hugh Jackman seemed like a very capable host and it was nice to not have to listen to stupid oscar jokes the whole telecast. Also, the Pinapple Express little movie in the middle was totally rad. I love that fucking movie. Overall the nominees this year were the weakest Ive ever seen in my whole life. And I really was looking forward to hearing what Mickey Rourke would say when he won. Oh Well.

Ive never been gay about a phone before, but for the most part my new Google Android Phone has me smitten.

Just got the new Mastodon album and cant decide how I feel about it yet. Blood Mountain grew on me over time but this one is a lot more vocal heavy and in some ways kind of Alice
in Chains-ish. We'll see.





Now Let me catch you up on things since:

We have moved into this awesome house. There have been some personnel changes though. Our line-up when we moved in was Ian-Wispy-Garett-Eli. As of this month, the line-up will be Ian-Ryan-Merrick-Anika. Wispy is going to be gone for the summer and is subletting his room to a cool chick named Anika who works at everyones favorite hot dog/late night hangout Zach's Shack. Merrick is a craigslist recruit to fill Garett's shoes, as Garett has gone off to travel indefinitely. Ryan is a friend who replaced Eli in our dorm room. My lady has been staying here for the past few months but she is moving into her own place in a couple weeks.




Wispy cut the box frame of my bed in half.




Documenting the mass-murder of a colony of ants in the bathroom



For the most part this house has been pretty mellow. Which is nice because everyone is old and lame now. I got Wispy's job at this sandwich and pizza joint called Tribute's on NW 23rd and Kearney. It's all right but im pretty sure everyone that works there hates me for some unknown reason. If they don't hate me then they are just the biggest group of assholes on the planet. But, Im glad to have finally gotten a job. Working minimum wage gigs again is terrible though. I make in two weeks of shit work what I was making in 3 days of easy work. Thats the trade off for living in a city that is actually desirable to live in, I guess.




Best Picture Ever?




Rachael trying her first Root Beer Float




Lounging on a Sunny Portland Afternoon



Right now Im just trying to figure out what to do with my life. And I'm finding it difficult to get used to this whole "being an adult" thing. I have never felt so insecure about my future in my whole life.




I worked on the Blitzen Trapper music video "Black River Killer". It should be out soon. For more pics of the shoot, go to my flickr account.




My dad's drunken tattoo. It says "DEATH TO TYRANNY"



My favorites at the moment are the new Sunn0))), the new Mastodon, and this.
That's it for now, byebye